The other night I had my first midwife appointment for the new baby.  The first appointment is always loads of fun, with a million and one question, recounting medical history and all that fun stuff.  One of the standard questions is, ‘was this pregnancy planned?’  I’m not exactly sure why, but this question bugs me.  I think I understand the intent behind this question, but it seems like an unimportant and unnecessary question nonetheless.

Or course the pregnancy was planned.  It was planned by God before the foundation of the world. But, I’m fairly certain she was not looking for a theology lesson, so I didn’t give this answer.

Does it really matter whether it was planned or not?  Regardless of intent, hope or desire, this child is here.  Does planned or unplanned really matter?

From a medical standpoint, part of her job is to ensure the mental health of her patients.  If this was a unplanned pregnancy, it could possibly be unwelcome at this time, and cause an inner struggle. I get that.

At the core of her phrasing is the idea that we have ultimate control over our reproduction.  That, at will, we can choose to get pregnant or chose to prevent pregnancy.  In reality it is the Lord who opens and closes the womb, not us.

At the core of this question is also the assumption that people are actively ‘trying’ to get pregnant, or are intentionally preventing pregnancy.  Why is the assumption one or the other?  Aren’t there folks who simply enjoy the marital bed and allow God to give or not give children?

Maybe the better question is, ‘was this an expected pregnancy.’